The Pub!

For several months after my brush with the “bikers”, I was reluctant to venture far from my hometown. I was probably still in some kind of shock, which left me in a constant state of anxiety and depression.

I spent most of my evenings and weekends just hanging out in my local pub. It felt safe and secure and I was lucky that most of my mates also spent much of their leisure time drinking there with me too.

As the months passed our drinking habits became more and more excessive.  Usually after several pints of beer my nervousness seemed to reduce greatly. The alcohol made me feel happy, more relaxed and less anxious. I was able to talk to people more confidently, albeit slightly slurred. 

The highlight of my life at that time was our regular  drinking sessions, which often took place on Friday and Saturday evenings, however on the odd occasion it also occurred on weekdays as well. My whole life seemed to revolve around the pub and alcohol, mainly because of the euphoric feeling that it gave me.
 
The landlord, who we’d all gotten to know quite well, would often lock us in his pub after closing time, allowing us to carry on drinking ourselves into oblivion. It seemed like great fun at the time. There was very little to worry about, no threats or acts of violence to deal with, just lots of drinking. 

It was during one particular splurge, I drunkenly stumbled across a tattered copy of The Sun newspaper lying on the barroom table. Inside was an article that randomly caught my eye. I could hardly read it due to my drunken state, but the headline captured my attention, it read “The Alcoholic State Of Britain.” It was an interesting caption and one that I wanted to look at in more detail.  I managed to slowly read the article and discovered that there was a section that asked the following questions;

(1) Are you the first to enter the Pub? I answered yes.

(2) Are you the last out of the Pub at night? Again, yes.

(3) Do you have most of your meals in the Pub? Yes.

(4) Do you drink more than three pints of beer when visiting the Pub? Yes.

(5) Do you visit the pub more than five times a week? Yes.  

The summary at the end of the article suggested;

If you’ve answered ‘yes’ to most of these questions you could be seriously on the way to becoming an alcoholic.

After discovering these findings, I have to admit that I felt rather proud. I thought to myself, I’d actually ‘passed the test’ and quickly informed my mates.  They also completed the survey with very similar results to mine. 

I didn't think anymore about the newspaper article until a few weekends later, when my health started to deteriorate.  Apart from the usual hangovers, I also started waking up with  severe "shakes", which I now recognise is a typical symptom of alcohol over-indulgence.

I also realised that my anxiety was becoming worse when I wasn't drinking. I was finding it increasingly difficult  to hold a normally conversation in public. Halfway through chatting with someone I would just shut down not being able to speak any more.

At the same time, physically I was also suffering with a re-occurring lower back ache. It was probably my kidney’s saying 'no' to drinking.' My Liver must have been crying out at the same time after relentlessly trying to detoxify my system. My whole body was beginning to send me messages, saying that enough was enough and if I ignored these telltale signs I would be heading for serious trouble.

I began thinking more and more about the questionnaire that I'd read in the newspaper, I eventually came to this simple conclusion: - I was eighteen years old, my weight had increased to over sixteen-stone (224 lbs) I was constantly short of breath due to regularly smoking and I was on the verge of becoming a teenage alcoholic. 
 I also had some serious psychological issues to contend with as well. To cut a long story short.........I was a complete and utter mess.